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Not To Be Leveraged

Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.  Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control (1 Corinthians 7:3-5 NKJV).

The relationship between a husband and wife can be the most exhilarating relationship available to mankind, next to our relationship with God.  When a man and woman make the commitment to become one flesh in the union of marriage they are richly blessed in many ways through intimacy and communication.  There is a special bonding reserved between a husband and wife. It is to be expressed through their conversations, and their emotional and physical affections given to each other.  This type of sexual and emotional intimacy should only be expressed and received within a God-ordained marriage.  

In my years of counseling — as well as life in general — I have seen many marriages ripped apart due to a husband or wife abstaining from giving their spouse the emotional and physical attention that was rightfully due to them, and instead they improperly gave it to another.  Many times an argument within the home is not addressed, and a spiritual chasm between the husband and his wife begins to occur.  Instead of addressing the issue properly in a biblical way, so that they may be reconciled unto God and each other, one, or both, will simply go to bed angry, and they begin to shut out the other person emotionally and physically. 

God knew men and women would be tempted in the areas of pride and stubbornness when dealing with problems within their marital relationship, so He made sure to give us great counsel within His Word — counsel to guide us through these times, and to warn and keep us from being tempted to make further mistakes.  We can see this in Eph. 4:26-27, where the Apostle Paul gives a stern warning against the potential root of bitterness, resentment and anger when he says, “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil (NKJV).  And in 1 Corinthians 7:5, Paul addresses married couples specifically, telling them, “Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control (NKJV).

Paul was basically saying, hey, don’t hold back from having sexual relations with each other unless you are both in agreement, and even then be careful you don’t continue for so long a time that you cause your spouse to be tempted sexually by Satan and his emissaries.  In any case we should never use our bodies as a way of leveraging our anger towards one another in our marriages. 

I want to be clear here. Sex is not the only reason for marriage, nor is it the most important reason, but it is God ordained and it is an awesome blessing and a biblical obligation — one to be valued and respected for sure. 

I want to encourage you to think and pray upon these things today.  I pray God’s abundant blessing upon your marriage this day. 

STUDY QUESTION: According to the Scriptures contained within this devotional, what can we learn about our authority within the relationship of marriage, as well as our responsibility to render what is due?

PERSONAL INVENTORY: Are you rendering the proper affection due to your spouse that is due them?

PRACTICAL APPLICATION: Choose to treat your spouse with the utmost respect and show them the affection that is rightfully due to them.  

PRAYER FOR TODAY:  Father, thank You for showing me Your heart within Your Word.  Help me to see clearly when I am not showing my spouse the affection due them.  In Jesus’ precious name, amen…


Blessings upon your day, Scott





Copyright ©2017 by Pastor Scott Wright.
Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Bible text from the New King James Version is not to be reproduced in copies or otherwise by any means except as permitted in writing by Thomas Nelson, Inc., Attn: Bible Rights and Permissions, P.O. Box 141000, Nashville, TN 37214-1000